But today as I'm reading it, a character was daydreaming and it brought me back to some sermon given by some pastor who talked about how we have lost our creative nature... and I thought about how I don't allow myself to daydream. If I do, then I must document it by journaling. Otherwise what a time wasting worthless activity! AND by golly... that is a lie and today I took a few minutes to let my mind wander and daydream... about my future, the ocean, God, etc... I think that it might make God glad to free our minds from constant "purposeful" activities and just let go.
I'm moving:) I'm moving to the beach. I'm moving in with three girls. I am saying good bye to a little one bedroom apt where I learned that who I am alone is not always consistent with who I am with people. One thing is for sure, you do find out new things about yourself when you are alone and you are forced to come to terms with it! When I think about moving, it is like a fresh breeze blows on my cheeks. It is time. Time to recognize that I do not thrive in every circumstance, that I have to have courage to change things I am able to change and accept the things I cannot. I can't change that I live in San Diego far from friends and family. I can change that I hate living alone! Some confusing sadness and insecurity cause me to question this decision... but it is always difficult to let go of the familiar. It might be easier to stay stagnant, but it sure isn't healthy.